Vision

It was out there.  The quote –

“What we behold-we become.  Where we look – is where we go.  Correct vision is crucial.  Be intentional with your attention.”

One time, my little boy was having a wonderful time playing in our living room.  He was running through the kitchen, giggling and laughing, and he was headed to the hallway leading to his bedroom.  I think he was about 3 years old.

Anyway, picture this – belly laughs, fat rolly thighs bouncing, and a little man looking back over his shoulder.  There was no time to react, he was going too fast.  BAM!!!  He missed the hallway and hit the wall.  Bounced about 3 feet back into the room and sat there staring at the wall.  No more laughter.  It was like he couldn’t believe someone hat just put the wall there – and it had been there since he was 6 months old.  Same son is now notorious for riding his bike watching over his shoulder at his sister.  Do you think he’ll ever learn? 

This really speaks to me!  Pursuit is not reflection and remembrance.  Sure, that’s part of learning, growth, and maturity, but if we spend our entire lives wishing we could go back to the times when things were great, we will run to that same wall.  I’ve done it. 

My college years were amazing.  I went to Brownsville Revival School of Ministry for 2 years and graduated Magna Cum Laude in December of 1999.  I was in the 3^rd class, and was smack in the center of an amazing period of church history.  I loved it!  During that time I lived in a tiny one room apartment above someone’s garage – no TV, no internet, no radio.  Just me, my CD’s, my Bible and my piano.  I gorged myself on my education – and I was given the opportunity to travel with music teams on more occasions than I can count.  I played on the school worship team with Bill Ancira (though I think I was more of support than a necessary instrument), and even got to lead a couple of songs at the revival on a Friday and Saturday night.  Not as much as some, but more than others.  I consider myself VERY blessed!

Still, in pursuit of the Kingdom agenda that involves me and moves through me, I cannot spend all of my time wishing I could go back to those days.  God has given me the opportunity to pour my life into a hurting people who have been abandoned by everyone in the name of religion.  

I needed this quote – what we behold, we become.

I have many friends on facebook that point to different seasons in my life.  Some were in bands with me at Brownsville.  Others were friends from high-school.  They both represent where I was – who I used to be.  But I don’t want to be Evan running straight for the wall while I laugh, and carryon looking over my shoulder and enjoying my past. 

Do I miss it?  Sure. 

I miss the full teams of talented musicians who were pursuing God as much as I was.  I miss the amazing things that used to happen in the music practice room on the back side of the campus.  The creativity – the harmonies – the instrumental blendings!  Wow!  People used to follow the Spirit of the Lord as they played and we would have some incredible sessions.

But the reward for that has been earned. 

What am I going to do with where I am now?  Will I regret that I don’t have a stacked team with passion for Jesus?  Will I despair that I haven’t worked with a full band in a year? 

Sure I miss it – but no I won’t.  God has chosen to give me as a gift to these people, and I will do everything in my power (and then rely on the Lord’s strength) to create an atmosphere of worship in the midst of their hurting and broken situations.  If I’m constantly missing where I’ve been, I will become bitter with where God has placed me now. 

So I will choose to be intentional with my attention – just as Jesus was when He set His face like flint toward Jerusalem and the cross (Luke 9:51).  The Message Bible says it this way:

“…he gathered up his courage and steeled himself for the journey to Jerusalem.”

If you’re not watching where you’re going, you’ll end up flat on your face.  Guaranteed.  And if your vision is a skewed, it will lead you where you don’t want to go.  Take your eyes away from the Author and the Finisher of our faith, (who, for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the Throne of Majesty) – take your eyes away from Him and you’ll end up someplace you never intended to go.  Your sight is your steering mechanism.  You might not like that, it might prove inconvenient, but it is absolutely true. 

Consider these passages:

“I will lift up my eyes to the mountains; from where shall my help come?  My help comes from the Lord who made heaven and earth.” (Psalm 121:1-2)

“Where there is no vision, the people are unrestrained” (Proverbs 29:18)

Eve saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to her eyes (Genesis 3:6).  Sin inevitably followed.  She being deceived fell into transgression (1 Timothy 2:14)

Abraham raised His eyes and looked while the knife was in his hand to slaughter his own son.  There he saw a ram (Gen 22:13)  He was vigilantly watching for the Lord’s provision!

Moses sought out God!  He climbed the mountain and he pleaded for God to “show me your glory.”  (Exodus 33:18) And yet the children of Israel couldn’t bear to look upon the Lord, or hear the voice of the Lord (Deut 5:25-27).  It seemed too great a responsibility – they’d be obligated to respond. 

Before Joshua led the army of Israel to Jericho he “lifted up his eyes and looked, and behold, a man standing opposite him with his sword drawn in his hand…”  He saw the Captain of the host of the Lord, (Joshua 5:13-15) and then led his nation into a battle drama that was incomprehensible!

And during the cycle of the judges, men would do what was right in “their own eyes,” and the nation fell into sin, disrepair and judgment! (Judges 21:25)

But what about the New Testament –

Matthew 13:15 – “For the heart of this people has become dull, with their ears they scarcely hear, and they have closed their eyes, otherwise they would see with their eyes, hear with their ears, understand with their heart and return, and I would heal them.”

Mark 8:18 – “Having eyes, do you not see?”

And what about when Jesus told the disciples to lift up their eyes to the harvest (John 4:35)

And Paul’s message that the Lord sent him to people in order “to open their eyes that they may turn from darkness to light.”  (Acts 26:18)

Your sight – your attention – your perception… they lead you.  Where your eyes wander is the direction of your heart.  And if the direction of your heart is for anything other than Jesus, your life will follow.  What you sow, you reap.  Peter mentions eyes full of adultery, and the fact that they never cease from sin.

But what happens if your eyes are full of Jesus?  What happens if you are pursuing Him?  What happens if your great quest in life is to please your Father?

I can only imagine….