Is it a control thing? I don't think so. It's more like a processing issue...
And now I'm processing the desert.
You know, I have books about this. Books and books - and books about this place. They talk about Moses and his trial as a shepherd in the desert after having run away from Egypt. And they talk about David as He waited - after having already been anointed - as the next king of Israel. And Jesus' experience immediately following his baptism.
I've read them all. I thought I had it all figured out. I rationalized and filtered everything I would do through the theories of logic, doctrine, and spiritual awareness - and yet I find I'm ill prepared.
I've always thought of the desert as a place of waiting... learning patience. I figured I'd just sit and wait for God to move. I could do that. Stand firm and wait.... I never realized the endurance that actually requires. The desert is so much more than a lonely place.
It's a dangerous place...

It's a hot place...
![[Canyons2.jpg]](http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_69NtpQnEV6I/SSXV-uNECJI/AAAAAAAABK8/zJrn4tjudNU/s640/Canyons2.jpg)
Devoid of water, food, or nourishment of any kind...

And right now I am heavily feeling the danger, heat, malnutrition, AND lonliness that comes with this place.
Standing firm requires more than just a decision to do so. It requires a hefty amount of endurance in the midst of struggle. It's a very hard place, and I can honestly say that I have underestimated it's assault.
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